Dancing Stormtroopers? Only if Jar-Jar dies.

Ok, George Lucas has gone too far.

I can deal with Christian Hayden as Darth Vader. I survived his brat attitude and never really dark or compelling acting. I survived, barely, the existence of Jar-Jar who thankfully had ever smaller appearences in the prequel films. I even handled the bizarre and Scientology-esque existence of miticlorians that are in fact the Force, and the death of the best bad guy outside of Vader himself - Darth Maul. But you can only push a fan so far.

George Lucas has now greenlighted a stage production of Star Wars, as a musical. And there is going to be singing Wookies. And a Stormtrooper kick line [Note: this has been updated such that the Wookies and Stormtroopers may not be singing and dancing - we can only hope]. This sounds like a joke, or someone trying to make The Producers in real life. But this isn't either of those.

Hey, I'm a fan of Star Wars as much as anyone. I've seen every movie several times, know the histories of all the major characters. I've read many of the novels that continue to carry the story forward and was really pissed when they killed Chewbacca. I even had a few of the model toys when I was young (I am 40 you know). But singing Wookies and dancing Stormtroopers?

If this rings of the infamous Star Wars Holiday Special, which if you are under about 35 you never saw so be thankful, I think you are right. George Lucas may have enough money to burn, but this is not one of the ways I might chose. And I doubt many fans will agree with Lucas on this.

Now Lucas is no fool. The play will also feature an exhibition of never before seen props, models, drawings and the like. That will draw fans. That's the money maker. Especially if he gives fans a chance to buy the originals or (limited numbers of) reproductions of such. I would go to do that. But not the play.

Perhaps the only way I would go to see singing Wookies, Ewoks, a dancing Stormtrooper and Emperor Palpatine is if there was a clear scene of the funeral of Jar-Jar - or better yet watching him blasted into bits in space so we don't have to hear him. And even then I'd have to flip a coin over it.

**The original source of the story, which I link to, has dropped the singing Wookies and dancing Stormtroopers as I was writing this. So Lucas has not gone insane it seems. This is not a stage event, but a music concert with enhancements, it seems. That makes massively more sense. Yahoo, where I saw the news first, had an old version of the uncorrected story.

Still I would love to hear the funeral march for Jar-Jar.**