Tuesday, July 14, 2009

Prepare for the arrival of Thor, and Natalie Portman

I was wondering, what is it you think of when you hear the name Thor? You know, the Norse god of Thunder. A mythological being that lives in Asgard, and is the source of the day of the week called Thursday.

Classic image of Thor from 1872

For those only slightly familiar with the mythology, you likely think of a big dirty Viking. Maybe you envision Arnold Schwarzenegger from the movie Conan the Barbarian. Either view would likely be very accurate. Of course some comic book fans would point to the character that Marvel has had for decades. And the subject of a 2011 comic book to movie conversion.

Thor as envisioned by Marvel Comics

Which brings me to the point of this. Natalie Portman has been signed on to portray the nurse of Thor. In the comics she in fact takes care of the weak human host of Thor, Dr. Donald Blake. He is the human embodiment of Thor on Earth. At least as Marvel’s backstory goes. Dr. Blake is average in most respects, until he strikes his cane to the ground and becomes Thor. But if that sounds too silly don’t worry. Marvel has reportedly killed that part of the backstory. So the deity that is Thor will have a human nurse, for whatever reason he might need it.

So who is Thor? Who commands lightning, has the strength to lift 100 tons, does not fall ill, has a body that Lou Ferrigno and the Governator would both be jealous of? Chris Hemsworth.

Chris Hemsworth

Not too impressive huh? Well if you are wondering who he is (and I did), if you saw the mess that is the Star Trek relaunch (revisioning) then you saw him for a minute or 2. He was George Kirk, father of James T. Kirk – future captain of the Enterprise. If you are looking for another movie role to judge Hemsworth by, and he needs it, you need to wait for this years’ A Perfect Getaway or the revisioning of Red Dawn next year. But either way, he is Thor.

He hardly looks Nordic to me. Blond hair might help but he is no Max Von Syndow, Kirk Douglas, or even Rutger Hauer for that matter. Still I am far from an expert on Nordic looks. He has nothing on Vikings, though I imagine that there must have been smaller, weaker Vikings somewhere. And as for the mythological looks, don’t even get me started.

Will this be a good movie?

Way too soon to tell. But we do know this. Thor is at best a teir-2 Marvel comic. So the fanbase is hardly huge. Plus we know that there will be plenty of CGI as Hemsworth is hardly a bodybuilder, let alone a Norse god. We can also assume that Portman is around to distract the men from any non-action scenes. This will cut down on the need for a plot or solid writing, as all we need is her in danger and in tight dresses. Thus I expect this film to be about as good as Ang Lee’s Hulk.

Hopefully I am wrong. And there is more than enough time to prove me so. I hope Marvel uses it.

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